Comedy

Rock Slyde (2009) – Newsflash: P.I. Looks For Missing Comedy; Fails

Synopsis: Incompetent Private Investigator Rock Slyde (Patrick Warburton) must solve the mystery of who is following his client whilst keeping the evil Bartologist cult at bay

My Take

I have literally sat and listened to Patrick Warburton read a burger menu. It was one of the greatest things I have ever experienced, and I’ve been to an Elvis themed Roller Disco. His voice is like soft butter on warm pancakes and makes everything he says sound a) better and b) instantly funny, whether he means too or not. With the exception of Family Guy he is generally the best thing about any film/scene he is in. See terrible comedy Rules of Attraction, which it turns out is still a thing. Or the fact that whilst he wasn’t the best thing about Ted for instance, the scenes he was in he stole 100% for sure.

It was for this reason, and this reason alone, I watched Rock Slyde. I had my suspicions that it would be poo. Mainly because headline act number two was Andy Dick [shudder]. The man has his funny moments, but if a film has him as its antagonist then it’s probably not going to be great. Nevertheless I have a purile sense of humour and often films with low IMDB or Netflix ratings make me pee my pants like an incontinent octoganarian being tickled after downing a pint of water.

rock_slyde_1

Rock Slyde (Warburton) is a terrible PI who occupies office 101 of a huge complex, the rest of which is occupied by a cult called The Bartologists led by the malevolent Bart (Andy Dick). He is also hired by a lonely woman (Rena Sofer) to follow her around. The Bartologists want him out of the office so they can have the whole building, but he resists their mind trickery. There is also a sub plot about him not being able to make coffee and some gay musical porn.

There are some great ideas in Rock Slyde somewhere but they couldn’t quite find a way to make them work as a singular piece of work. Patrick Warburton as an incompetent Private Investigator is great. He nails the self deprecating loveable buffoon and there are enough weird recurring jokes to stop it falling completely flat (his aforementioned unfortunate career as a pioneer of Gay Musical Porn). Also the sight of Warburton driving and then attempting to reverse park a Smart Car is genius.

But the plot is just too offbeat to carry all the way through. The rest of the cast also isn’t quite up to the job of making the whole thing hold together. In fairness to Andy Dick he is well restrained as the softly spoken antagonist cult leader Bart in a role that could have led to histrionics and scenery chewing.

Rock Slyde is entertaining for every second that Warburton is speaking and then kind of dull for all the intervening periods. Essentially what I want is for him to do an audio series as Rock Slyde. 30 minute old school radio plays where he investigates things with the consistent presence of his rivalry with Bart and the Bartologists. Damn, that might actually be great.

Right…..you heard me say it. I COPYWRITE THAT IDEA!!

One last thing for anyone who ever casts Andy Dick in anything. No one, and I mean literally no one ever ever ever ever wants to see him greased up and shirtless. Never have I before been so certain that Roger The Alien from American Dad was based on Andy Dick both orally and visually.

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Conclusion: Not as funny as it thinks it is. Patrick Warburton should be mandatorily cast in all films from now on along with Nathan Fillion.

Verdict: 5/10

About

Director/Writer: Chris Dowling – Nothing else of note, except that he has a recurring role in Days of Our Lives. Which is kind of weird.

Cast: Patrick Warburton, Andy Dick, Rena Sofer, Elaine Hendrix, Jaime Alexander, Jason Alexander, Lea Thompson

Trivia:

  • No trivia of note

Dylan

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